Living a life with Multiple
sclerosis.
It
has been almost seven years I’ve been living with this illness. Sometimes
people asked me, what did you study? What are you working as now since you are
already twenty five. Sometimes it’s really hard for me to answer those two
simple question.
I
didn’t manage to continue my study after I graduated my hgh school due to the
starting of this desease. Frequently relapse. Not able to stand or walk like
normal human being does. When i first didn’t know about what i actually have, i
kept on asking myself. What did i do to the humans i know until they are not
happy with my and do something to me, but certainly i was wrong.
In
the year 2007, a few months after I had an accident with a my motorcycle, i
broke my femur and collar bone, it seemed a little stange when one side of my
eyes couldn’t stop moving. Was there anything wrong with my head? Am i crazy or
is it just an illumination? Oh, gosh I wonder/ I went to the hospital
optimatrist a couple of times, but they just game me the same answer,
“Your
eyes are moving, miss,”
Of
course I know that, or else why would I come and ask for you? They didn’t
bother to send me to any special regarding my eye sight, at the end, it
seriously made me loose my temer and i decided to stop going to see them
anymore.
At
the end I went to a private hospital and was told to do an MRI, and the dr said
there’s nothing wrong with my vision, only the nerve that was controlling my
eyes are corrupted. I was saying, I’m sure that he is lying to me. No, i wasn’t
sure of anything at all actually. The Dr told me to see a neurologist
specialist in another Hospital.
So,
I did. And he sad that there’s two more test to confirm if I really have this disease.
The vision test was a failure since i
couldn’t be sure with what i am looking at, but at the end as all the result
came out, yes, I am confirm with having multiple sclerosis.
I
was suffering for a few months after that. I used to have a normal life, but
what will happen to me now? I don’t know.
Thank
God that I have people nearby me giving me courage to move on. My family, my
love, my friends, though they know i’m not capable in doing a lot of things,
they would still give me courage to move forwards with my life.
Well,
of course how can I forget these five faces that always made me smile as well.
Arashi.
Though
they are not near me, but they would still be there in my heart.
Even
though I am missing a lot of things in my life, a chance to be the best among
the best. No, at least to be the best in what I’m capable of doing, I still
smile thinking that I am still breathing. Maybe He had given me something that
I do not want, but He gave me something else for me to cherish and remembered
for the rest of my life.
That
He is always there, my families are always there, my friends, and my love, they
will always be there for me.
II
might not be apable in achieving what you have already achived, but I am happy
I am still living. Cherish your life for those who are still breathing. Love
anyone who are there for you. Thanked them for always being there for you.
Disease?
No, it’s not an excuse for you.
Keep
on smiling, have a happy life ahead of you and always believe that YOU can
always move forward. J
( c ) Kytty Sakuraiba 2014
