Equation 181: how would i

Sometimes I sit on my own and I close my eyes,
Remembering the time when you first ask me why,
How I've lost my words since I don't even know how,
How should I answer you but you keep on enquiring why,
But somehow as time had passed us by,
With memories that bring smile to our face,
With incident that sometimes torn our heart away,
It made me remember you more even though at times,
I wanted to forget that you are there in my life,
How each day you bring me happiness,
Carving a light across the empty space in my solemn heart,
I wanted to forget you,
But the more I do,
I would still remember you,
And the more I'm telling myself how much in hating you,
The more love I felt for you.
But somehow at the end,
I know who am I to you,
And in between the distance stars in our life,
I know that one day we would be torn apart.
How long can I restrain the pain,
Before at the end,
I could be wishing you the last goodbye,
How long will all of this last,
How would I endure the pain,
When I know at the end,
I won't ever see you anymore in my life.

(C) scarlet storm 2016